Hi all! My name is Kirstyn Sokolsky, but I've gone by Kiri all of my life. For as long as I can remember, fitness has been a huge part of my life one way or another; it's something that I have always been able to rely on and something that I've always had a passion for. Although I had started my "official" fitness journey a couple years back, it wasn't until recently that I officially decided to go public with it, and share my journey with all of you. I started an Instagram page (@kir_fitness_) to share pictures, workout videos, meal ideas, and just daily updates on my lifestyle, hoping to inspire others the same way I was when I started. Additionally, I decided to start a blog, where I have more of an ability to answer any questions or start any discussions in more detail. What better way to start my blog than to tell you the story of why I started my own fitness journey?
Ah so where do I begin...
All my life, I had been an athlete. My parents grew up athletes, my mom having played tennis, and my dad, soccer. I tried both out as a kid, but at age 5, when I was coerced into attending a rec soccer tryout, it stuck, and I never looked back. I played soccer from the age of 5, all the way up until this winter, at the age of 20. From middle and high school teams, to club teams, tournament teams, guest teams, and collegiate soccer, my life was nothing but athletics. I never minded though, I loved it most of the time (I wasn't a fan the conditioning parts, but who is?)! It was a way for me to relieve stress and do what I loved at the same time; when I played, I forgot about anything and everything else for a while.
Throughout most of my career, I was "little Kiri". You know, the smallest girl on her teams. I was shorter than 5 feet until my junior year of high school, weighed 105 pounds at max, and was known for being the fastest player on the field. I loved my body, because it allowed me to be an amazing player... and that's all that mattered to me.
Since I was so small, however, my dad wanted to start me on a mild lifting program with a strength coach for the sole purpose of injury prevention in soccer, so in 9th grade of high school that's what we did.... for a couple months anyway. I had stopped because I felt like it was doing me more harm than good. But in 10th grade, when I suffered a hip labral tear in a tournament, everything changed. My speed decreased due to limited hip mobility. My gait cycle altered because the cartilage in my hip would catch on the bone if I walked normally. I was constantly in pain, but didn't want to go through surgery due to the long recovery time, and the high chance of making the injury worse to play with. I decided to start back with the strength coach in order to start a lifting rehab program, and strengthen the hip flexors and glutes in order to diminish any pain I was feeling.
The program was going pretty well, and everything was pretty steady... until my junior year hit, and so did puberty. I may have only grew to 5'2", but my weight increased to 135, my jean size went from a 00 to a 6, my hips grew, and everything changed. I wasn't able to eat anything I wanted anymore, without consequence anyway. The skinny little girl who was known as "that soccer girl" had changed, and mentally, was more self conscious of herself and the way she looked. My parents made sure to point it out too; "Kiri, you've gotten bigger. You know, you can't eat like that anymore, right?"
I continued to attend my strength coach's lifting sessions, but they were becoming a hassle to attend, as the gym he ran was a 30 minute drive one way. The workouts were minimal, too. I felt like I could do so much more than what I was being told. My workouts consisted of basic, functional movements: lat pull downs, lunges, goblet squats, kettlebell swings, and occasionally I could bench or deadlift. All three sets. All 10 reps. I was bored and I wanted to do more; to push myself. So finally, my senior year of high school, I convinced my parents to get me a gym membership. It was only to Planet Fitness, so I lacked heavy weights, squat racks, and barbells, but it was a good way to start my own lifting experimentation. Needless to say I had no idea what I was doing.
Having played a lower-body focused sport all my life, and with the new craze being big butts, you could only guess that legs were my favorite thing to train. In fact, (promise not to make fun of me or laugh) I trained legs 6 days a week, and forcing myself to take a rest day was the hardest thing I ever did. Looking back, I know I was insane, trust me. I don't know why I did it, but hey, just another thing I was able to learn on my journey. Please never train legs, or any other muscle group for that matter, 6 days a week... please. Anyway, I was getting frustrated due to the fact that I wasn't seeing any progress (shocker), and I began to believe that cardio was the enemy; that cardio was the thing destroying my muscles (despite the fact that I was only doing cardio twice a week, and that was soccer practice). So besides soccer, I cut all cardio from my workout program. I performed the same lifts every day, and ate terribly. I overloaded on carbs because that's what I was taught to do as an endurance athlete. Needless to say, I looked sloppy, bulky, and overall, I hated my appearance. Throughout the next year or so, I continued to my journey. I changed gyms and started attending Golds, which had more equipment options. I took my leg days down to 5 days, then to 4, then to 3-4, training them every other day. I didn't experiment with different exercises that much, but at least I learned the importance of rest!
Senior year ended, and my first year of collegiate soccer was about to begin. I spent the summer doing nothing but working out; I lifted 6 days a week, and was out at the track conditioning 4 days a week. Looking back. I don't think I ever gave myself a rest day... but I was in the best shape of my life when it came to aerobic capacity. Despite that, I still wasn't eating properly, so I still didn't like how I looked, and I felt like my body wanted to quit on me most times. I decided to try out tracking my macros for the first time. It was a total mess. I was eating at maintenance, so I had a decent amount of food in a day, but I thought that the only things I was allowed to eat was chicken and rice...yeah I wasn't doing the whole IIFYM thing right. Needless to say, that lasted about 2 weeks before I quit and went back to my original eating habits, and continued to hate the way I looked and felt.
Fast forward to college, I ended up injuring myself and sitting out most of the season, however, the injury still allowed for me to partake in lifting. I was doing literally zero form of cardio, and was doing subpar, half-assed workouts. I was also eating like complete crap... college was nothing but an endless buffet of bad food. From Wawa trips and eating out, to limited healthy food options in our caf, I was putting on fat like I never had before. For the first time in my life, I was actually fat. I had no muscle definition, everything was jiggly and lose, and I had lost all tone and definition. It wasn't until I came home over winter break that I really noticed. I put on a pair of jeans that I had always worn for work, and they felt like they fit differently. I came home from work and my mom said something about me looking different; looking bigger. The number on the scale didn't change, but everything else about my body did. I decided to start taking my workouts more seriously; partake in more intense lifts, do cardio, and stop slacking. I changed my diet slightly, being more careful about what I consumed and when I consumed it, listening to my body to tell if I was actually hungry. Although this method worked to get me back on track, I still wasn't happy, confident, or where I wanted to be.
I ended up transferring colleges, and continued my soccer career at my new school.
Finally, April 2016. The month I decided that enough was enough. I was tired of looking in the mirror and hating what I saw. I was tired or trying to decided if I looked good enough for my standards each time I looked at myself. I was tired of worrying if I looked good in these leggings, or if this crop top made me look fatter than I was. I went back to tracking my macros, and decided that I wasn't turning back once I did. And that was that.
I started on a cut... probably not the best idea, but I did it because I didn't know any better. I made my workouts weeks in advanced, planning out each day and developing workouts by using research and looking at my fitness role models on Instagram and YouTube. I tracked everything I ate, and was finally happy with the lifestyle I was developing, because I was in control of it.
(I can tell you all more about my journey since then in another blog!)
Since this past winter, I no longer play soccer. However, my fitness journey continues on! I lift 5-6 days a week, with three of those days being legs days. I also do cutting and bulking cycles. (right now I'm in a cut!)
While I have learned a ton since then, I can say with 100% confidence that this lifestyle change was the best thing that I have done for myself. It hasn't been 100% smooth sailing since then; I've faced so many obstacles to get even where I am today. But I've become confident and happy with who I have become and what I have come to look like. I've learned so much about myself along the way, and continue to learn more each day. I love my new lifestyle, and have such a strong passion for what I do, and my fitness journey is far from over!
My goal is to be able to inspire others the same way that my role models did for me, and to help people take that first step in the right direction and stick with it. Everyone deserves to be happy in their own skin. I hope I can help you all, and answer any questions you may have throughout your journeys as well! Welcome to my blog!
